I spent most of my life up until my mid 20s picking myself apart. I can remember being ten years old, thinking my thighs were too big compared to my sister’s twiggy, eight-year-old thighs. In middle school my skin was too greasy, my hair too wavy. In high school I wasn’t outgoing enough or thin enough or pretty enough. Even the first few years after college, I still didn’t like myself. I questioned every decision I made. I was in an unhappy relationship, but too scared to leave because worst-case scenario I’d never find someone else to be with again.
Thinking back now I laugh and roll my eyes. All of my self worth issues were based on comparisons I had in my head between myself and ALL the more attractive, more successful people on planet Earth. How absurd?! So, how did I get out of the funk that was my life? I made the conscious decision to put myself at #1. I got out of a relationship that was no longer serving me and started to create a life of my own.
With the encouragement of my outspoken, driven, independent best friend I decided to try out climbing because what could be more badass than two single ladies who climb?! Soon after joining Climb, we started taking Renee’s Bootcamp class. Much to my surprise I was strong and competitive, and I liked pushing my body to its limits. A year later I had my personal training certification, a community of friends at Climb, and more love for myself than I had thought possible. I had begun to create a life that supported my wants, needs, and growth.
These are a few of my rules to live by…
Drop Comparisons - Living life from a place of comparison is like always being in someone else’s shadow. This is YOUR life. Take control of it. Know that your self worth is not tied to your physical appearance. Your self worth is not tied to how successful you are professionally. Your self worth is not tied to having a romantic partner. Your self worth is not tied to how many compliments or nods of approval you receive from other people. Check in with yourself and ask: Am I doing my best? Am I surrounding myself with people who, love, support and challenge me? Am I able to enjoy the quiet moments with myself? Can I see the beauty in my day-to-day life?
Recognize Your Best Qualities - Every single being on this planet has worth. Every single being has something to contribute. Recognize the things that make you, you. We shine brightest when we are doing the things that we love, the things that we are good at. Find your thing(s), and share them with others.
Own the Choices You Make - Don’t beat yourself up when you feel like you’ve made a mistake. Own it. Live it. Learn from it. Every decision you make takes you to the next place where you need to be. Acknowledge that some of your choices will take you in directions you hadn’t planned to go, but that unexpected destinations or setbacks are not necessarily bad.
Create a Mantra - I am strong. I am beautiful. I am enough.
Write yourself notes and place them in your house, car, or office to remind you, “ I am ________________ . “
Look at your self in the mirror and repeat your mantra.
The conversations we have with ourselves shape the way we live our lives. Stop tearing yourself down because of your physical appearance, poor food choices, failure at this, that and whatever. Start to recognize the things you are doing well. Be kind to yourself, and don’t be afraid to fall in love with yourself.